Never meant it

I hate you.
I hate you all. Thats true.
I never meant it. Never. Not even once.
Its all lie, i never meant to say it.


I said things i didnt even understand. I said it all just to make sure maybe i can fit in a little bit.
But i never meant it.

Well..
None of you. There's none of you.
None of you could heal the pain. Not even a bit. But the thing is, it comes deeper whenever im around you guys.

You know what.
I dont think i'll ever find someone. yeah, that typically "someone".

I wanna be thankful once for having you guys around me after my tragedy 3,8 years ago. I learned a lot tho, even tho i know i alrd forgot almost everything.
It sometimes hurts, not sometimes, i can feel it almost everytime.
Whenever i go out, and then night after the day, i always feel the same thing,it hurts.

I hate you all,
for not understanding me, after i told you one of my stories.
for not appreciating me, after the things iv done for you.
for not asking, about why, what ever happened to you that you have to be so sad like that.
for always saying things like, its okay, its gonna be over soon, be patien, dont think too much, blahblahblah. like the fuck, iv been sad and depressed for years and DONT EVEN DARE TO TELL ME IM GONNA BE OKAY CAUSE I'LL NEVER BE AND I KNOW THAT.
I hate you all for being rude.
I hate you all for being so dramatic.
I hate you all for being so interested in  life.
I hate you all for being so annoying af.
I hate you all.

i came to this unwanted place, and found all of you.
thankyou, but i will forget you soon.